Tywin Greyjoy
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Re: Backstory Help Thread
Thanks for the info, I think I know what I need to to write myself a back story now.
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9/10/2010, 7:18 am
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virtunous
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Re: Backstory Help Thread
Here's the back story I've made so far. Tips and criticism are welcome.
My name is Virtunous. I’m human mercenary who fights between florintin and large shield and sword with only thoughts of the battles yet to come. I wasn’t always like this. I was a knight once. I commanded the army that was stationed in the capital of my lord’s kingdom. My lord, King Aero, all the other knights who swore fealty, and I knew of the forces of Maegamarth were rampaging across the world. Our history of military might echoed across the world, we thought his forces would come for us last, especially since we were on the other side of the great bay that led to sea. We were wrong. The some creatures that serve him are just as cunning as any military general. They attacked our shores in the dead of night. The fort that guarded our coast fell almost immediately.
By mid day; a soldier, barely alive and mortally wounded told us they were heading for the capital. Messengers were sent out to all the forts and towns that had any men to send all of them to the capital. We thought we had two days to build our defenses. We were wrong again. That night they laid siege to our city walls. All we did before the siege was bar and barricaded the main gate. Half the night was spent with best and lesser archers on the walls holding off what they could and small battalions of common soldiers and knights. Out of the hundred and fifty who could fight, thirty pike men and ten common soldiers were in before the gate.
I don’t remember it clearly, but the main gate was destroyed by a firry blast. As I heard the blast, I left my post on the wall to have my family escape. As I got to ground level, the men by the gate were gone. I ran to my house, with the sound of carnage behind me. As I opened the front door, a black skinned creature was eating the flesh of my wife. Her throat had been ripped open. I roared and beheaded it, only to hear a sound of someone or something escaping through the window. My thoughts immediately went to my daughter and I rushed to the next room to see her. When I saw her, she was already dead; half of her body was eaten away. Before grief could consume my heart, I went into a blind rage. I went outside and cut down anything in my way to one of the secret exits. Friend or foe, I didn’t care at that time. As I got to the exit, I used it and ran.
I know the capital fell that night, but I don’t know what happened to King Aero. Then again I don’t care anymore. The only thing I valued among above all is gone. My family is dead. I became a mercenary who would only fight for the good cause. Even if that good cause is suicide, I take it up. I’ve lost everything that had meaning to me, I don’t flinch at the thought of death anymore.
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9/24/2010, 5:49 pm
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reggie dagooblin
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Re: Backstory Help Thread
i would change the fact that you fight fourentine and sword and bored to something more real world like "feel just as home with steel or shield in my hands" lots of small grammatical errors which you can fix. read it aloud and see where it dosnt make sense. other than that very solid story and fits well into character. also take out the fact that you are human. it is a little up fornt IMO. other than that it is a solid story grats guy. if you need help with weapons or any thing else to get active status then hit me up on face book. Reggie Altis is my name. same for anyone else needing help with garb weapons backstory whatev
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u can be good or simply outnumber them ....or be a goblin and do both
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9/24/2010, 6:34 pm
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Toland
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Re: Backstory Help Thread
quote:
reggie dagooblin wrote:
lots of small grammatical errors which you can fix. read it aloud and see where it dosnt make sense.
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oi.
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9/24/2010, 7:06 pm
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Warg
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Re: Backstory Help Thread
Hey All,
I'm thinking of coming from Dugar originally and having made it to the mainland. Then sort of being found or running into some members of the Crusade/Fury.
Does that sound alright? It'll be a little bit more in depth than that, but thought I'd check.
Also, anyone wanna be the "finder(s)"?
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I was thewed like an Auroch bull
And tusked like the great cave bear;
And you, my sweet, from head to feet
Were gowned in your glorious hair.
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9/25/2010, 12:06 am
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LeosSparto
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Re: Backstory Help Thread
It would be an honor to "find" you Worg. Just saying.
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___________________________
"Spartans, lay down your weapons.
King Leonidas: Persians! Come and get them!"
-The Battle of Thermophile.
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9/25/2010, 3:24 am
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Seigh Karnath
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Re: Backstory Help Thread
I'm in the process of rewriting my backstory so it doesn't sound like a Disney movie. Right now I've got my origins narrowed down to two places: Brakken and Nettaur - both in The Midlands. Does anyone have information that will sway me one way or the other?
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4/18/2011, 11:13 pm
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Khron
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Re: Backstory Help Thread
Hey its Devin
i have the basic outline of my backstory and would like some input/help
Name: Khron (this is now going to be my dag name)
Born into a wealthy family
father left to join the crusades
father went missing
after a while i decided to run away to look for him
this is just about all i have right now, i figured i could add some odd jobs he picked up before he ran into fury. i also need a way he ran into fury
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5/1/2011, 5:58 pm
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a11438
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Re: Backstory Help Thread
I feel like you should have your dag name be "Guy"
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"The first step is Love, the second is mercy"
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5/2/2011, 1:15 am
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Khron
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Re: Backstory Help Thread
guy? just guy? lol
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5/2/2011, 4:10 pm
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