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Registered: 03-2012
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The Fable of Trog

     Thar i was on me ship, searchin fer them sharks. A fortnight went by with no shark sign, then i sawed it, a Furyan vessel, as seaworthy as could be. Me ears perked up when i herd the sound of a grown man squealing like a girl, thrashing around with one o them damned flying attack sharks gnawin on them knees. I tell yeh, nothing is more terrifyin than a flyin shark in a blood frenzy. I veered me schooner (the maiden gaper) towards yon distressed vessel securin me crotch armor(gots te have yer priorities straight), and grabbing up me harpoon.
      I clambered up thar Furyan vessel, nimble as an exotic whore, bellowin profanity that'd make a proper lass choke on er biscuits. There were a firey bearded lad, and a fellow wearing wrap pants o exceptional quality(with basketball shorts completely visible) battling them flyin shark banshees. i noticed a portly fellah cowering behind them, bawlin his eyes out cryin "You cant hurt me, im a hero! I save lives!" Apparently no one told him that savin lives, jus makes attack sharks e'en more ornery, caus soon as he said it, a flyin shark bit his pecker right off.
      I sprang inta action, spearin left and right into them sharks wit my harpoon. After half a fortnight of stabbing an cursin, i foun meself on top of a mound of dead attack sharks smearin meself with their blood and laughin hysterically. Jus one of them was left, an it had its back turned to me an the lad with a firey beard. We snuck up behind yon shark an simultaneously baked its beans, puttin it in a world o hurt, then speared that devil right in its liver. Afterwards there was much celebratin and baked beansin with vodka and cranberry juice, and i were officially inducted into the furyan navy, to fight along side the saltiest seamen in eryndor.
3/16/2012, 10:47 pm Link to this post Send Email to dantrog   Send PM to dantrog Blog

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